Full Fungus Salad

IMG_2207Full Fungus Salad

Prep-time: 3 minutes (or however long it takes you to chop)
Calories: Few. Mushrooms are surprisingly low cal.
Healthy (+): Lots and lots of green.
Healthy (-): Cheeeeese
Cost: about $8
Feeds: One lonely diner

Delicious scale: 4 stars


– 6 white cap mushrooms
– 1/4 a head of romaine lettuce
– 5 cherry tomatoes
– finely grated mozzarella cheese
– basil cheese dressing


1) Chop chop
2) Choppity-chop-chop
3) ???
4) Profit
(seriously, it’s all chopping)

Sometimes when I’m caught up in life (read: napping, studying, napping, writing, napping, reviewing etc) I forget to take the time out of my busy napping day to go out to the grocery store and buy nice, whole foods that aren’t going to kill me in a race between diabetes and cancer. That leaves me at the mercy of whatever I have in my fridge to make something healthy to eat when I have that “Oh, Shit, I actually have to eat.” moment. Fortunately, The Partner usually picks up green things when she comes home from work. She claims she has a vested interest in my health. I think she likes to see me suffer.

Today I happened to have romaine at my disposal, as well as my salad staples, cherry tomatoes and cheese, and some mushrooms. I’m going to be honest, as much as I love mushrooms, white caps are the only ones I’ll eat raw. I don’t know why. Conditioning, I suppose. White caps were all we ever had when I was growing up. Japan has so many varieties of mushrooms that I feel a little overwhelmed when shopping for them, so I tend to stick to my old favorite.

Admittedly, I’m not a huge fan of romaine. I think it comes from once having found a dead moth in my caesar salad. Something like that tends to put you off of a food. I don’t care much for its fibrous texture and oddly enough, I don’t find it as flavorful as iceberg, which has been proven to be nothing but a bunch of water molecules trapped in the tightest bear hug ever. Anyway, romaine makes a good salad filler. At least as good as cabbage on the best of days. I’ll always prefer it paired with barbeque, but it makes a good bed for mushrooms and cheese in a pinch.

Speaking of which, mushrooms and cheese has to be one of the best food pairings I’ve ever had. I’ll make stuffed mushroom caps entirely with cheddar cheese and be a happy woman.

How You’re Supposed To Make It

Asparagus & Mushroom Salad


Rushed Italian

Rushed Italian SaladIMG_2157

Prep time: 10 minutes
Calories: 250ish
Healthy (+): The salad mix is mostly just water.
Healthy (-): Go easy on the dressing.
Cost: $10
Delicious scale: three and a half

The Rushed Italian salad is the perfect salad for the health conscious individual with the flexibility to leave the kitchen a disaster for a few more hours. Packed full of root vegetables, it’s sure to give you the energy you need to sprint off to that meeting you’re already 10 minutes late for.

How did I make it?


– One bag of mixed salad. This one had iceberg lettuce and julienne Japanese radish. If I’m being honest, it was mostly radish.
– 3/4 of a fat carrot.
– One whole, skinny cucumber.
– Five cherry tomatoes.
– Italian dressing.



1) Start this salad off by being late for work. While hastily closing the lid on the raw ingredients you’ll need to put it together later, flip the container over and throw tomatoes across the room.
2) Curse. Curse a lot, and rewash your tomatoes.
3) When you finally make it to work, dump the bag of salad things into the bowl.
4) Cut the cucumber in your hand with a butter knife because you can find neither a cutting board nor a cutting knife.
5) Cut the carrot as quietly as you can because there’s a meeting going on in the lunchroom. Do this on the cutting board you just found,  but with the same butter knife.
6) Add cucumber, tomato and carrot to salad.
7) Add Italian dressing.
8) Awkwardly leave the lunch room. Try not to make eye contact.

For being made in a hyper rush, it was a pretty good salad. I definitely added too much dressing though, which made it too spicy/salty. The cucumber and the carrots go very nicely with the Italian dressing, and the radish adds a nice water balance. It needs meat, though. Everything needs meat.

How you’re supposed to make it.